Japanese Computerese |
In Japan, they have replaced the impersonal and unhelpful Microsoft error messages with Haiku poetry messages. Haiku poetry has strict construction rules--each poem has only three lines, made up of a total of 17syllables: 5 syllables in the first line, 7 in the second, 5 in the third. They are used to communicate a timeless message, often achieving a wistful, yearning and powerful insight through extreme brevity. Here are a few actual error messages from Japan that are the essence of Zen. (I have included only my favorites; you can search for more of these if you like.)
Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.
Your file was so big.
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.
Program aborting:
Close all that you have worked on.
You ask far too much.
Yesterday it worked.
Today it is not working.
Windows is like that.
First snow, then silence.
This thousand-dollar screen dies
So beautifully.
With searching comes loss
And the presence of absence:
"My Novel" not found.
Stay the patient course.
Of little worth is your ire.
The network is down.
A crash reduces
Your expensive computer
To a simple stone.
You step in the stream,
But the water has moved on.
This page is not here.
You seek a Web site.
It cannot be located.
Countless more exist.
Having been erased,
The document you're seeking
Must now be retyped.
Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank.
This page copyright 2000-2007 by Lisa Hammond | last update 10 July 2005